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Friday, October 22, 2021

‘I don’t think I’m a good mum; I’m selfish’

parenting couple

When it comes to being a parent, everyone is just trying their best and that’s all they can do.

But that doesn’t mean mums and dads don’t still feel pressure to behave a certain way or do things differently with their children.

One mother has recently opened up about her own parenting situation, claiming that she doesn’t think she’s a very good mum because she is too “selfish and self-absorbed”.

Speaking anonymously to 9Honey, the parent told how she had always wanted to have children, but when she finally did, she wasn’t ready to give up her ‘me time’ and didn’t have any patience.

Troubled mum, hugging kid

She said: “I’d wanted to be a mother since I was very young remember – probably the age of six is the earliest time I can recall wanting to be a mum.

“When my partner and I got together we were very young and then got married in our mid-20s. I told him that I wanted to be a mum as soon as possible so we had our first child when I was 27, then our second when I was 29, and our third when I was 30.

“But here’s the thing; I love my kids but I don’t think I’m a great mother. I’m just too selfish and self-absorbed.

“I know this because I’ve had years of counselling about it. I do think that people who are like me shouldn’t be parents.”

Netflix on a laptop

After 8:30 pm the kids aren’t allowed to bother her while she watches Netflix (stock photo)

The mum went on to say that she complains whenever her kids ask her to do something and she never liked playing with her kids.

“When they were toddlers I played with them as much as I could but I found myself getting so irritated over the slightest thing. Or when the kids had fights, I would fly off the handle. I just had no patience for them when they were small,” she explained.

“And now that they’re getting older, I haven’t improved.”

Other reasons why she thinks she’s not a good parent, include wanting “me time”

The mum tells how she’s “addicted” to Netflix (aren’t we all) and that once it hits 8:30 pm, her kids know they have to go to their rooms and not disturb her while she watches TV.

She claims she’s been criticised for doing this by relatives.

“My sister, who is a really good mother, tells me I’m being too selfish and I can’t expect to have ‘me time’ every single night. Especially when the kids might need my attention or need help with homework,” she says.

“My sister said, ‘Have you ever thought that your kids might just want to hang out with you? Maybe they can watch some Netflix with you instead of being banished to their rooms?’”

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